‘I don’t want to like other men’: My wife’s taken me back but I can’t stop being gay

‘Imagine it or not I really like my spouse – however in a sisterly approach. Is there remedy that would make me cease wanting different males?’ (Image: Equipped)

Final week, we helped a lady devastated by her dishonest husband, who slept with their daughter-in-law.

This time round, we’re serving to a husband, and father of two youngsters, whose spouse has taken him again after he left her for one more man. He says he doesn’t need to be homosexual however yearns for the love and firm of males.

His spouse has taken him again on situation he ‘stops being homosexual’. It looks like an not possible scenario for this tormented man.

Let’s see if this can be a drawback that may be solved…

The Drawback:

What the consultants say:

Attempt to have a look at this one other approach. The issue isn’t that you're homosexual, which isn't a alternative – however the truth you need the not possible to please your spouse.

‘You’ve tried to cover your sexuality, forcing your self right into a relationship with somebody you don’t discover bodily enticing’ says Dr Angharad Rudkin

‘Though this “sisterly” love can fulfill some facets of your life, it's going to all the time go away you feeling dissatisfaction. Dwelling such a lie is damaging not simply to your individual well being and stress ranges, however will make these round you sad too.’

‘The proof suggests so-called “conversion remedy” doesn't work, as a substitute growing the danger of substance abuse, despair and self-harm.’ says James McConnachie. ‘Would your spouse need that for you, the daddy of her youngsters?’

You are feeling compelled to decide on between your loved ones and your sexuality however McConnachie believes you possibly can have each.

‘Don’t deceive your spouse and have a boyfriend on the facet’ he says. ‘However you do want to speak to her about making a future collectively that permits you to be you, whereas having an actual function as a loving dad.’

Rudkin agrees you is usually a nice dad and a very good good friend to your spouse. ‘Dwelling an genuine life will create contentment.’

Attain out to straightpartnersanonymous.com that will help you and your spouse discover a approach ahead.

What do you suppose?

Laura Collins is a counsellor and columnist.

The Specialists:

James McConnachie is the writer of Intercourse (Tough Guides)

Dr Angharad Rudkin is a scientific psychologist

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