Social media influencer Jordan Toma has a touching message for every teenager who is annoyed by their all-knowing mother.
"I want you to remember this about your mom," Toma told his 1.4 million followers on TikTok in a recent post. "Your mom is just the first one to pick up on it."
The father of two and published author then explained what the "it" is: "If you’re not telling the truth," if "something isn’t right" and if you're "leaving a little bit of your potential on the side."
"She’s the first one to pick up on knowing exactly who you are," he said.
Because mom is the first to know, Toma said she's often also the "annoying one," "the one you don't want to hear" and "the enemy."
"Now I’m telling you to remember this: Your mom is the first one to pick up on you. She knows you. She can see you," he continued. "She believes in you. She’s the first one to pick up on all the great things you’re ever going to do in your life, so don’t do the opposite.
"Everyone else will see it later," Toma said, "but your mom will look back from the stands and say: 'I knew it first. I was picking up on it.'"
Jordan's message is one that stems from his own personal experience as a result of his relationship with his mom, Debbie.
Jordan grew up in New Jersey, and told the TODAY Show that his life "felt like a roller coaster ride" and that he "didn't fit in."
"I have ADHD, I'm dyslexic, my reading comprehension — all of that was really really hard for me and I couldn't sit still, I couldn't just focus and I really didn't know where to start," Toma said on May 11.
"The other side of that was how I saw myself," he added, "and all of that kind of just made me feel so different and that I can't make it like everybody else."
As Jordan struggled in and out of the classroom, he said one person "never gave up on him."
"I knew as a mom he was suffering inside," Debbie told the TODAY Show. "One time I found a note in his drawer that said: 'God, you gave me many gifts but you forgot one — you forgot to make me smart.' That kind of broke my heart.'"
Toma admitted that he "gave his mom a really hard time," but said that his mom "matched his defiance" and kept giving him everything she had.
"As a mom, I knew I just couldn't give up," Debbie said. "I had to keep him on track and I had to let him know that I believed in him."
Toma said his mom would constantly tell him that he was smart "in his own way" and that he "has gifts, we just have to uncover them," but added that "at the time, I didn't believe her."
It wasn't until Toma started a summer transition program at a local college that "something started to click."
"I remember looking at myself in the mirror and then I asked myself: 'What if my mom is right about me?'" Toma said. "I should just listen for the first time in my life."
Toma graduated from college in 2012 with a degree in psychology and became a financial adviser. In 2015, Toma spoke to students at the same pre-college program he had attended.
"I saw the kids had hope in their eyes," he said.
That feeling propelled Toma to create the platform he has today — which includes more than 3 million combined followers across various social media platforms — to inspire children and pay tribute to his mom.
"What would come into mind was how much my mom was really the reason why I was even doing this," Toma said. "And then I started talking about: 'Hey, look at your mom, right? Think about who is believing in you."
Toma's mom, Debbie, has her own message for parents.
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